Don’t you just love spending time with a friend. Even a simple walk in the park, an ice cream at the corner store, coffee together… A simple moment becomes a wonderful memory when shared with someone close to your heart.

I guess today is not so wordless after all

She became my friend in first year college. There were tough times but since we were kindred spirits, our friendship sustained college more than anything else. I remember her being so generous when she knew I had nothing to spare. I remember her being so down-to-earth, never boasting about her status in life, never making me feel like I was lower in social status. We reviewed for the board exams together and we shared so many things back then, even sharing food when we were short of our allowances. She was like a sister to me, I was probably closer to her than my real sisters back then.

We were supposed to work for the same auditing firm. But I got accepted in the accounting side (BPO) while she was in the waiting list. Instead of waiting for a call from the firm, she opted to work for a family friend’s business.

I was so envious of her that time because whenever I talk to her, I felt like she was having fun while I was being harassed by my bosses and the clients I was handling. Not to mention the salary I was earning was really small compared to her. I remember crying so bad one morning while she was talking to me and because she knew I was so depressed that day, she kept on calling to check on me. For that alone, she will forever hold a special place in my heart. Even my sisters would not do that to me.

So after half a year of enduring the firm, she asked me if I wanted to work for the same company she’s working for, the sister company being a trading firm was looking for an accountant. I went for an interview, it was just a formality because I was highly recommended by her. I was offered a job the same day I was interviewed and I accepted. We were laughing and crying after that interview. That same day, I tendered my immediate resignation at the firm.

We worked for almost a year. She was the personal assistant cum accountant of the owner. I was the one-woman accountant of the trading firm. It was a lot of fun. But then, like all good things, it came to an end. That was a pretty rough patch of my life. Something bad happened in the company and I had to resign. The trust that we shared was broken because of it.

I was so ashamed of letting her down that I did not answer her calls. I can still remember her voice, almost crying that night, while asking me if I want her to come and get me. I was being harassed by my boss back then. I was crying so hard I told her that it’s okay. But we were like sisters crying on the phone. That’s the last time I talked to her.

She talked to my mom one more time, asking about me, if I was okay. But after that, she stopped calling. I couldn’t blame her.

They say things happen for a reason and maybe, she came into my life to make me feel what a real sister is like. I am crying while writing this post. It was 7 years now. I know I should let go of the regrets I have in my heart. But this regret will forever be here.

I miss my sister. I wish she can read this now.

I am an old soul. I love listening to old music, those ballads of long ago that stirs the love in my heart. I got this from my mom who oriented us with mellow music.

My mom loved those 50s music, those that feels like you are being swayed while lying on a hammock. I remember my dad always teasing her about listening to those oldies music, especially on Sundays. Mathis, Armstrong, I forgot the other singers…

One of her all time favorites was What A Wonderful World by Louis Armstrong. I could still see her smile whenever she heard that song. I was listening a few minutes ago to Fools Rush In, another favorite of her.

These old songs also bring a smile to my tired soul. You never do appreciate the things to have and learned until the person who helped you learn that something is already gone. Thanks, Mom!

Time and again, I find myself struggling. My sister put it aptly… I don’t really know my priorities. Much to my chagrin, she is right. And now I am asking myself, what really are my priorities anyway?

My heart and mind has only one answer… My main and foremost priority in life is to be happy and contented. That’s it! I need not be rich. I need not be sexy or beautiful. All I need is happiness and contentment in life and I would die a happy girl.

What will make me happy and content in life, you’d ask.

Seeing my family happy, healthy and financially stable. Writing to my heart’s content and not doing accounting work. Not rushing to work in the morning. Not worrying about our family’s finances. Being able to travel and truly relax.

With that said, I do have my priorities. It’s just that most of the time, I lose my focus. 95% of the time, I get lost.

I am given a wake up call last night.

Thank you.

I woke up to a gloomy skies. But I love it! I am beginning to love the rain more and more. Maybe it’s because I felt that I’m being “cleansed” in the process. Rid of the past that I wanted to forget for the longest time.

So how’s your day so far? Good morning and happy Monday everyone!